I’ve had it. Get used to a new sword in my arsenal of faith.
Bible. As a devout Christian, it is perceived that I am happy with our new President. Let me assure you this is not the case. I am always abundantly clear how I am a much better Christian than most people on this Earth. So, it stands to reason that this would include even world leaders. Many of my fellow evangelicals are rejoicing at the anointing of this man to public office. That’s just chicken dooky! The man is making a mockery of Christ’s love for all, and the mission to love our neighbor. The only neighbors he loves are when he’s staying next to a brothel! His poor foreigner wife couldn’t be less interested in being in the public eye and that is written all over her face. Dear Donny, “Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord” is a scripture you’d be wise to study. Your petty actions towards those who irritate you are shameful. Why, you ask, am I so brusque about all of this? The man didn’t put his hand on the Bible when he was sworn in. You’ve irritated the wrong Babatist here!
Budde. To further show how these are end times, I must go on record praising an Episcopal preacher. EPISCOPAL! I’m skating awfully close to Catholic doctrine here, and that just doesn’t mesh with my Babatist beliefs, but I digress. As a woman in ministry, I listen closely when other women of such stature speak. Sister Reverend Bishop Marian Budde preached the Word at the National Cathedral in the presence of our new President. With a passion as intense as Paul’s letters to the church, Sister Budde spoke the Lord’s word of grace and mercy. And she spoke directly to the Commander in Chief, exhorting him to act in such a way that would emulate the love of Christ in the world. I have half a mind to cross-stitch a pillow for Donny with the letters WWJD on it. But I fear that he’d look at it and think “Wild Women Jump Donald” rather than its more spiritual intent. Thank you, Bishop Budde, for your boldness in proclaiming the gospel. You’re getting pretty close to my level of Christianity!
Baristas. Speaking of Christ’s love and welcome, Starbucks has rescinded its decision to welcome all into their coffee shops regardless of intent. Need to come in from the cold? Starbucks said there is room. Need to use free WiFi? Starbucks said log in. Need a place to read your bible between prayer meetings? Starbucks said kneel here. Choosing to buy a beverage or pastry while there was secondary. Now, in keeping with this new world of inhospitable behavior, those days are over. If you’re in a Starbucks, you best be coughing up cash for caffeine. THEN feel free to loiter, use the potty or crack open your laptop. Sodom and Gomorrah were destroyed for the sin of inhospitality. I’d hate to see some barista turned into a pillar of salt.
