Let us lift up these prayer concerns.
Ideal. The Lord is moving again in our great nation! I’m getting involved in the reopening of Alcatraz. It will be now called “The Rock of Ages,” and will offer 24/7 revival services, baptismal dunk tanks in former solitary cells, and scripture study groups in what used to be the mess hall (because man shall not live on bread alone). Every cell now comes with a Gideon Bible and a framed portrait of me. May this be a place where the walls are strong, the faith is stronger and the Wi-Fi blocks CNN. I predict that through those creepy halls, even the ghosts will be speaking in tongues. Ideally, I am praying that our current President will christen this venture by checking himself in for redemption. Amen?
Identification. Brothers and sisters, identify thyselves! As of this weekend, the sacred “Real ID” will be a must for mission trip travel. Without this verified identification, the unclean can be denied entry to the hallowed halls of American airports. I shall be standing at my post by TSA observing the gnashing of teeth of those unprepared. I’m grateful that my driver’s license is like a new Christian…..already converted. While this may seem unnecessary, I believe it to be scripturally inspired: “Render unto Caesar not just your taxes, but also your biometric data, proof of residence, a utility bill and the blood of your firstborn.” Fortunately, this kind of identification is never necessary at my church. We’ll judge you on our own. Praise!
Idiots. Finally, I just gagged on Monday evening when I turned on my Magnavox in time to see the parade of ridiculousness at the annual Met Gala in New York. It’s as if every attendee felt the need to come up with an ensemble that would be over the top even for Halloween. It’s so difficult to single out any one particular offender, especially when we were seeing so many idiots I could not identify, but I do want to note a few. I had to pause for prayer for Sister Vera Wang. Lord, provide her some daily bread! Sister Kamala Harris showed up in a very stark black and white dress, reflecting her campaign for President which failed to take note of the vast gray areas at play. Brother Colman Domingo showed up in a choir robe bedazzled by a freak locked up with a crack pipe and a hot glue gun. Madonna was fairly well dressed, but her mask was frightening. Sister Janelle Monae…..you were Satan personified. And Sister Miss Diana Ross stumbled in wearing what appeared to be a wedding dress of dead chickens and peacocks. Lord! This event needs a holy visit from Eve, direct from the Garden of Eden. She could really work a few well-placed fig leaves!
