Sister Helen Holy

The 701 Club: Reforming, Reveling & Resurrecting

As sinners everywhere dry out from their 4th of July debauchery, let us consider these sobering thoughts. Reforming: History repeating itself. In 1776, the Brits really got their panties in a wad when a group chose to leave the monarchy and establish a new country which we call America. Now, 240 years later, another group of people have voted to […]

The 701 Club: Reality, Richard & Rebirth

With so much sadness in our world, I dedicate myself this week to staying light hearted. I pray that you are blessed with these thoughts this week. Reality: Well just gag me. I pride myself in basing my ministry here in Dallas, Texas. However, that Jewish impresario, Andy Cohen, just HAD to start another franchise of his “reality” show, REAL HOUSEWIVES, […]

The 701 Club: Tragedy, Trump & Tonys

Grief has washed over our land in these past days. May the Lord bless my efforts at levity to soothe our suffering. Tragedy: May we all pause for a moment of prayer and reflection for our brothers and sisters who senselessly lost their lives in Orlando this past weekend. My ministry cannot reverse such tragedy, but I know this will […]

Dallas Weekend Guide: June 9-12

The heat is on, but these five events around town this weekend are totally cool. Thursday to Sunday Fair Park 80th Anniversary What: Music, games on the Midway, FREE rides on the Texas Star (normally a gazillion coupons during the State Fair), all at this celebration eight decades in the making. The Full Scoop: http://www.fairparkanniversary.com Thursday to Saturday Heartstrings What: […]

The 701 Club: Muslims, Mexicans & Malice

I am EXHAUSTED from this week’s goings on. We need to pray for revival in this land. Here is a sampling of the filth among us. Get on your knees, Sinners! Muslims: The most famous Muslim in the world has passed on. Passed on to WHAT, I’m not sure, but I digress. Brother Cassius Clay, aka Muhammad Ali, died this […]

The 701 Club: Attackers, Angels & Apes

Prayerfully join me as I observe our world from a Christian perspective this week. May we all be on our knees at some point to benefit others. Attackers: It is a sad time for Christianity. The paragon of Christian education and home of my own personal training, Baylor University, has been caught in less than Christian behavior. Allegations of rape […]

The 701 Club: Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves

I wasn’t born in the wagon of a travelin’ show, but there are some half-breed idiots in this world. I’d rather turn back time than have to report on the following happenings in the world today. Take Me Home! Gypsies: The ageless, one-named diva of music just turned 70 years old. Let me break that down. Cher is 70. 70!! […]

The 701 Club: Bathrooms, Baseball & Bison

Prepare ye the way of the news. Behold, I bring a ministry of wisdom in these trying times. Read on, Brothers and Sisters! Bathrooms: There are so many signs of the end times these days, my head is spinning! In another move of pure evil, school districts and even the government are passing laws allowing transgendered people to use the […]

The 701 Club: Christie, Crazy & Carvey

Open your hearts, Brothers and Sisters, and let us ponder the world around us. Christie: This headline has really caused me concern: “TRUMP TAPS CHRISTIE TO LEAD TRANSITION.”  Trump is transitioning? This will crated a HUGE bathroom issue at Trump Tower. And how in the world is Chris Christie going to take time away from his eating schedule to have […]

The 701 Club: Cruz, Cruise & Crews

Another week brings another opportunity for ministry in the news. May these thoughts on current events speak to you heart. Cruz: I have heard it all! That cry baby, orange skinned former Speaker of the House, John Boehner, has embraced his private citizen status and allowed himself to speak his mind freely. Not that Brother JB no longer has to […]