This earthly life continues to befuddle and bemuse. Won’t you pray with me about these items of interest?
Liquidations. Let the rich of the earth gnash their teeth in sorrow. Purveyor of all things over-priced and of needless luxury, Neiman-Marcus, has put itself up for sale and could be facing bankruptcy. It is beyond me how a retail company which charges exorbitant mark-up on their goods could have possibly amassed $5 BILLION in debt and posted a loss of $23.5 million last year. Clearly, the camel that is N-M is facing serious weight loss in order to pass through the proverbial eye of the needle. Normally, I’d pray for those suffering financial burden, but I seem to be out of mercy in this case. I am predicting a change in N-M’s unofficial moniker from “Needless Markup” to “Needing Money”. Glory!
Liberals. Supreme Court nominee, Neil Gorsuch, has been portrayed as the ultimate Christian Conservative who will lead the return of the Court to moral high ground. Now comes news that Brother Neil, who was raised Catholic (CATHOLIC!), attends an Episcopal Church in Colorado known for its liberal stance on all things anathema to true Conservatives……caring for the poor, loving the immigrant, showing love and compassion, etc. Moreover, the rector of the church is a WOMAN! (Clearly, not a woman of MY Christian stature, but I digress.) How, brothers and sisters, will such a future jurist prevail in overturning immorality when he belongs to a church which actually preaches the practices of Jesus? Lord, help us.
Linguistics. And finally, in an effort to become more culturally lingual, Donald Trump has recently learned the meaning of the German phrase, “Grüße mich schlau, du unwissenden Mann. Schüttle meine Hand!” Which loosely translates as “Greet me appropriately, you ignorant man. Shake my hand!” Let us pray.
Photo credits: Washington Post, NBC News
