These news stories just trump everything this week.
Pecker. The news is really sounding filthy lately. I can’t turn anywhere without being inundated with stories about that trial in New York involving the former POTUS. The fact that this centers around hush money paid to a slut is just the beginning. Everything so far has involved a witness who is the publisher of the NATIONAL ENQUIRER, a publication which has frequently incorrectly predicted the apocalypse and/or given credence to stories of UFOs and aliens. Said publisher is cursed with an unfortunate last name. Bless his heart. But let us look at the big picture here. The first witness called in a trial about hush money paid by a sitting President to a porn star is named David Pecker. I can’t make this up. With the questions of whether Brother David released secret information or blocked certain stories, whether he is politically conservative, or even the fact of him being the initial person on the witness stand, the possible headlines are making me gag. Imagine “Pecker Goes In First,” “Pecker On The Right,” or “Did Pecker Leak?”. Disgusting. I can’t wait for this mess to be over!
Protection. Speaking of this criminal POTUS, he seems obsessed with obtaining immunity. I don’t really blame him…..we all want to be protected and healthy. But immunity from what? The flu? Hepatitis? COVID? Bad taste? And why is he asking the courts for this? I’d just call my local CVS for the appropriate anti-viral. Maybe he should just get shot with something. Let’s pray about that kind of cure.
Perverts. Let us turn our gaze upon our former FLOTUS, Sister Melania. She has kept a very low profile these past few years causing me to wonder if she had returned to her homeland. Fear not, as she is in the news for a recent event which she hosted at the Mar-A-Lago house. Mel focused her squinted eyes on a gathering of the Log Cabin Republicans. Thinking this was a group of syrupy conservatives, I had to look them up. These are all sodomites! Sodomite Republicans! They were raising money for “an effort to deploy resources to key swing states in educating voters about conservative LGBTQ+ causes.” And Melania was thrilled to be in their well-dressed midst. I guess if there are Christians proclaiming DT as a faith-friendly President, it stands to reason that a bunch of perverts can proclaim him as gay-friendly as well. I am prayerfully considering that, if Log Cabin tries to build a bridge between the gays and Number 45, there will soon come a cargo ship without a rudder to take care of THAT!
