I have been in a dry land so far this year. Grateful to be back with these words.
Babatist. I have delayed my thoughts on the death of former President Jimmy Carter due to my bereavement over the death of such a fine Babatist. I give glory to God for this man’s long life and his ministry to mankind. Other than being a little easy on the sodomites and lesbyterians, Brother Carter’s ability to follow the teachings of Christ with his life in such a bold way touched me deeply. Being able to view Jimmy’s memorial on the TV was an added treat. Seeing all the living former Presidents in attendance together remembering this great man was a blessing. (It was unfortunate that Brother Trump, seated next to Former First Lady Melania, sneaked a nap in during the memorial, but it was an opportunity for all of us to see this rare occasion where he actually slept next to her.) I pray that Jimmy was welcomed at the pearly gates by his beloved wife of 77 years and by the countless souls for whom he helped build houses on earth. And, of course, by our Lord Himself who served his years as a carpenter as well. Glory!
Backfire. The Lord called another of His children home back in December. Alas, we were just made aware this past week. Sister Anita Bryant, a former beauty queen and gospel singer passed away at the age of 84 in her home in Oklahoma. A regular on the Lawrence Welk Show, her wholesome face and spirit also led her to being the singing spokeswoman for the Florida Orange Growers back in the 70s. And also, like a good Christian woman, she used her celebrity status to speak out against the sodomites and lesbyterians in Florida in an effort to “save our children.” Bless her for her convictions! Alas, her activism backfired like a rusty Studebaker. The sodomites were not amused and sprang into action with visible consequences. During a spirit-filled press conference, Sister Bryant was pummeled with a pie in the face. Soon after, her “save our children” campaign was shot down, and she was dropped by the Orange Growers like a rotten tangerine. Ultimately, she retreated from the public eye, and we heard very little about Miss Sunshine. Perhaps this is why her death was kept so quiet. No funeral home in Edmond wanted to be faced with a mess of pies at the service. For me, I am remembering her by listening to one of her albums while enjoying a piece of banana cream pie and a big glass of orange juice!
Berate. On a lighter note, I’d like to recognize the recent telecast of the Golden Globes in a positive light. Historically, I berate these self-indulgent awards shows, but this year was a pleasant surprise. Sister Nikki Glaser served as hostess of the event and tickled my funny bone without ever being crass. Can you imagine! Most women’s attire was respectable (with the occasional exception), and the speeches were mostly sincere. Sister Demi Moore, looking like she’d been kissed by God Himself, gave us a short sermon on loving ourselves. Listen, if the SAG Awards and the Oscars can keep this up, I’m gonna be out of a literary job!
